One Wild Party
by Ronin2
Summary: Here's what happens when the SSX boarders throw a wild party. Beware, it may be a ba-ad story.


ONE WILD PARTY  
  
While I don't know what Big Bear Lake  
and Gitaroo Man is a registered trademark   
of, I know SpongeBob SquarePanz is the   
trademark of Nickelodean while SSX & SSX   
Tricky is the trademark of EA Sports/BIG.   
Somethin' like that.  
All rights reserved.  
  
(A snowy night at Elise's house in  
Toronto, Ontario, Canada, where Elise  
and her fellow Super Snowboarding  
eXtreme (SSX) boarders party hearty  
for Zoe's birthday. Right now, we see  
in one corner of the main room, Zoe  
on bass, Moby and Psymon on guitars,  
Marisol on the drums and Elise and  
Kaori on synthesizers.)  
  
Zoe:  
Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?  
  
Moby, Psymon, Elise, Kaori & Marisol:  
SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!!  
  
Zoe:  
Absorbant an' porous an' yellow is he  
  
Moby, Psymon, Elise, Kaori & Marisol:  
SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!!  
  
Zoe:  
If nautical nonsense be somethin' you  
wish  
  
Moby, Psymon, Elise, Kaori & Marisol:  
SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!!  
  
Zoe:  
Then drop on the deck an' flop like a fish  
  
Moby, Psymon, Elise, Kaori & Marisol:  
SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!!  
  
Zoe:  
Ready?  
  
Zoe, Moby, Psymon, Elise, Kaori & Marisol:  
SpongeBob SquarePants!!  
SpongeBob SquarePants!!  
SpongeBob SquarePants!!  
  
Zoe:  
SpongeBob....SquarePants....!!  
  
(The other boarders cheer at the hilairious  
performance. Brodi, helping his own self to a beer,  
turns to Luther.)  
  
Brodi: What did you think?  
  
Luther: I still say their guitars could use some tunin'.  
  
Moby: Hey, fatso, you're talkin' to the greatest   
guitarist outa England.  
  
Psymon: Not to mention the greatest guitarist outa Canada.  
  
Luther: Who you callin' "fatso?!?" I can sing better than you  
bozos.  
  
Psymon: Then prove it.  
  
Moby: An' like post haste.  
  
Luther: OK (sings)  
Big Bear Lake, with the motor boats a-puttin'  
Big Bear Lake, they're a-buzzin' an' a-buttin'  
Big Bear Lake, with the motor boats a-puttin'  
(blows raspberries)  
PLLLLLLLL!! PLLLLLLLL!! PLLLLLLL!!  
PLLLLLLL!! PLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!  
Puttin' all day.  
  
Mac: Why don't you go home an' play  
Gitaroo Man, you no talent Fatso  
Flanigan?  
  
Luther: Grrrrrr, I oughta--  
  
Seeiah: Hey, check out Marisol, she's  
at it again. What a card!!  
  
(In the center of the main room, Marisol stands  
with a red tablecloth over her right arm.)  
  
Marisol: Hola, todos!! I am la grande matadora.  
Bring on el toro!!  
  
(As if in reply, Psymon grabs two forks for horns and  
charges at Marisol.)  
  
Marisol: Toro, venga, toro, venga!! Se aqui!! (Psymon  
runs past her.) And that is what they call a lot of bull!!  
  
(Just then Psymon turns back for another charge--and  
that is when Marisol picks up another pair of forks.)  
  
Marisol: Toro.......toro......toro!! (jabs the forks in  
Psymon's buttcheeks) Touche!!  
  
Psymon: YEE-OUCH!! (pulls out the forks before he  
crashes into the near sofa.)  
  
Marisol: There he is, folks--the only bull in the SSX  
universe with a hospitalization plan. (belches)  
  
Psymon: What hit me........?  
  
(The borders howl with laughter while Psymon staggers off.)  
  
Elise: Poor Psymon. His get up an' go just got up an' went.  
  
J. P. : Least he got Blue Cross.  
  
(Later in the night, while everyone tears   
into the munchies, Kaori and Eddie play poker   
with Seeiah and Brodi until Eddie grabs Kaori's  
hand.)  
  
Eddie: Hey--I just played that card. How'd you   
get it, luck or cheat?  
  
Kaori: Riar!! You carr me a cheat?  
  
Eddie: I ain't callin' you for dinner!!  
  
Brodi: Hey, come on, settle down....  
  
(Unmindful of Brodi's words, Kaori picks up a  
cotton ball and throws it at Eddie.)  
  
Eddie: Throw a cotton ball at me, you st-------uupid  
Jappo?!?  
  
Seeiah: Cotton ball? Ain't that a dance for boll weevils?  
(laughs)  
  
Kaori: Jappo?!? I'rr fix you, you disco sucks ferra!!  
  
J. P. : Hey, no weenies allowed....  
  
(Soon Eddie and Kaori trade blows, hitting each  
other with their snowboards, till Elise tries to stop  
the fight.)  
  
Elise: Eddie!! Kaori!! Stop it!!  
  
Kaori: Iie way!! That roud dresser Eddie carred me a Jappo  
and said I cheated!!  
  
Eddie: Stop fightin'? We're just havin' fun!!  
  
Zoe: Round Two.  
  
(In the end, Elise DOES stop the fight and confronts  
Kaori and Eddie.)  
  
Elise: I am ASHAMED of you!! Brawling like a couple  
of hoods!! Where's that SSX spirit?  
  
Kaori: I regret it's dead.  
  
(Just then Seeiah wheels in on a cart a birthday cake.)  
  
Seeiah: OK, dudes an' foxes, here's Zoe's birthday cake!!  
(to Zoe) OK, Z. P., make a wish an' blow out those candles.  
  
Zoe: I wish that EA Sports/BIG would make a third sequel  
to SSX. (Pulls out a fire extinguisher and uses it on the cake's  
candles while the boarders stare at her in shock.)  
  
Zoe: What?  
  
(Long after everyone eats their cake slices, Elise gets up and  
addresses the boarders.)  
  
Elise: OK, all, as you may know, I hold the record for drinkin'  
the most beers--12 in fact Who wishes to try to beat me at that   
record?  
  
(Psymon gets up and points to Marisol.)  
  
Psymon: Marisol can.  
  
Marisol (in shock): Who, me?!?  
  
Psymon: Yup--unless you're chicken to beat Babycakes  
Elise "Sweeter Than Candy Canadian Girls Kick Butt"  
Riggs.  
  
Marisol: Me, chicken? I'll up the ante by steppin' up  
the beer quota to 24.  
  
Elise: Bring it on, Shakira clone....!!  
  
(With that in mind, Elise and Marisol try to drink  
24 beers; to the borders' surprise, the ladies do succeed,  
resulting in a tie, only for them to pass out on the sofa.)  
  
Moby: Elise an' Marisol would never do that....!!  
  
J. P. : Well, they did--an' wound up the next sleepin' beauties.  
  
Eddie: Let' s clean up before we hit the hay.  
  
Brodi: Amen. Seeiah, can you an' Zoe get The Drunk  
Blonde Twins to bed?  
  
Seeiah: Sure. (to Zoe) Come on, birthday girl.  
  
Zoe: Anything for you, dawg.  
  
(Zoe carries Marisol and Seeiah carries Elise upstairs;  
once in the upper hallway, Seeiah giggles.)  
  
Seeiah: Yo, Zoe, I just got a great idea 'fo a joke--  
let's put Elise an' Marisol on the same bed an' make it   
look like....  
  
Zoe: I get you.....hee, hee, hee, hee.....  
  
(Once inside Elise's bedroom, Seeiah uses Marisol's  
lipstick smeared mouth as a stamp on Elise's face  
like a rubber stamp, making lots of lip prints before   
she and Zoe place them in the bed. After that, the  
boarders clean up and head for bed. Then, early  
the next moring, we hear--)  
  
Elise & Marisol: AAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGHHHH!!!!  
  
Zoe: Whoo-hoo, they woke up.  
  
Seeiah: Hee, hee, hee, hee....  
  
Psymon: Now that is one way to party.  
  
(Elise and Marisol run for the bathroom sink, washing their  
faces of each other's lip prints.)  
  
Elise: Th-th-th-there is NO WAY I could kiss you....  
  
Marisol: W-what'd you 'spect?!? We were drunk!!  
  
Eddie: An' I thought Elise an' Marisol would never  
do THAT. My mistake.  
  
Brodi: Guess they had a party of their own.  
  
Moby (laughing): Elise an' Marisol, sittin' in  
a tree, K-I-double-S-I-N-G.  
  
Zoe: Now THAT was one wild party.  
  
'DA ENND 


End file.
